Mis(s)ing U

I wish I could send this letter to her
But I was suppose to move on from her
That was my mind in the old world
But I can't seem to let go of what unfurrel
She loved me when I was still finding
Caught me when I fell from climbing
Then when it was perfect timing
I left in one breath
Told her there was no one else
When in reality, I lost myself
Too busy looking for a warm place
To escape from a recluse mind state
How could I erase the memories
No more late calls after the drinking
Now it's long days of just thinking
But i can't change my past
But I can't just keep going and crash
Crashing into her in the streets
Not knowing how to speak
Not going to the peak
Because it's scary on top
It's hard to change when you have to stop
I can't keep going with her knowing
So in one poem, I share our moment