The beautiful Coretta Scott KingCaught a jewel today...
In a conversation with one of my closest friends, she explains to me that "all people want in their lives is to be loved and accepted." I pondered on that expression cause I am sitting here feeling disconnected from love and acceptance. Lately my attitude has been damn near erratic at times. One minute I want to be around someone, the next minute I could live on a destitute island with my IPod. I thought about the last time I felt love. I have to say it was when my son (which few people know the story about) was in my arms. I remember the last day I saw his eyes and kissed his face. The smile it brought when I held his perfect hands and laughed at his endless smile. When days were rough he was my peace and justice in a world of the insane. However, his moms decided to take him and run off into the dark. (I love how the legal system of America will take the mother's perspective regardless if it doesn't fit her character.) Since then I feel there is no need to love right now. Instead if I take the Jay Z philosophy of "keeping my both of my heads where they are suppose to be" then I will be "ok". So at this time, I take in the fact that anyone could do anything at anytime...and work til I find my justice and peace.
1 comment:
I can't even say I understand how you feel because I couldn't fathom the amount of pain I'd feel if one or both of my own were wrongfully taken away. The fact that you are still her and still standing says a lot about your strength and ability to endure because honestly I wouldn't be able to function as a normal human being if it were me. Just remember though that no matter how painful things may be you still need love and your friend was correct. Part of your healing will come through due dilligence in claiming what was lost and allowing yourself to love and be loved in the process. Closing oneself off from the world will not give you the peace and energy you need to move forward. If not someone, find some THING to love wholeheartedly and hold on to. You have to keep that part of you alive otherwise you will be lost forever while passing up your blessings in the process. No matter what, be open. All will work according to the master plan. Peace.
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